Remarrying: A Leap of Faith

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

With how hard it can be to date again after a divorce, you’ll probably be pretty happy when you find someone you connect with. When things start to get more “serious”, thoughts of remarrying might cross your mind. However, what if you’re unsure about if things will be a repeat of last time? There’s a few things you can do to help ensure this marriage goes how you want…

Remarrying: Making It Work

Understand your baggage

Remarrying without some kind of baggage is basically impossible. Still, that doesn’t mean you should be afraid of that. Rather, it means you should take the time to understand what this baggage is, and why you may have it. Once you do that, then you can ensure it won’t interfere with your new marriage.

For example, say your last marriage ended due to infidelity. This might cause you to be suspicious of your partner if they’re running late or out of town. You could also have trouble trusting them. Eventually, this could cause problems if you don’t confront and move past it.

Be open & vulnerable

Another thing about remarrying is that it’s important to be open to your new partner. It’s understandable to worry about being too vulnerable. Doing so can make you feel exposed, and bring about fears that your partner will take advantage of that openness, potentially like your last one did.

While that openness can be scary, it’s also an important part of any trusting relationship. You and your partner have to both be able to be honest with each other. If you are willing to be vulnerable, they will be as well, and your bond will strengthen overall.

Keep expectations realistic

Remarrying tends comes with extra expectations. Not only do you want this marriage to go well, but you’ll also probably be comparing it to your previous one. Sometimes, these expectations can get a little out of hand, and take a toll on your relationship when things don’t live up to them.

To avoid this, you and your partner should keep those expectations realistic. Try to sit down and talk to each other about some of those key expectations you have. These could be about finances, handling conflicts, raising kids, or anything else you may think of. That way, you can both be on the same page and get your expectations set accordingly.

Where to Meet People After a Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
If you’ve just gone through a divorce, the idea of getting back into the dating game might have you feeling completely overwhelmed. The idea of going on a date is hard to imagine, but some people don’t even know where to start. If you’re wondering where to meet people after a divorce, try starting with a dating website. You can also ask a friend to set you up. Try looking for local meetup groups to meet other people more casually. And finally, don’t forget to hang out with other single friends because being a group can take the pressure off and bring other singles around. Hopefully, you can get back into the dating game and be well on your way to meeting somebody special.

Where to Meet People After a Divorce: Get Back in the Game

Dating Websites

The first place to start to meet people after a divorce is online. There are tons of dating websites nowadays. You can find sites based on your age, your hobbies, your religion, and more. There are even sites dedicated just to divorcees. You can choose to be upfront about your divorce right there in your profile. Or you can choose to wait until you’ve gone on a date or two to reveal your divorcee status to a new partner. It completely depends on your comfort level.

Ask A Friend

Don’t forget to ask your friends to help you meet people after a divorce. They may not be single, but they could know singles in your area that might be a good match. A bonus of this approach is that you already know that they’re approved by your friends. No need to worry about a stranger being dangerous. In addition, your friends know your personality and might be able to pair you up with somebody that would be a great match for you.

Meetup Group

There are plenty of local meetup groups you can try out if you are trying to meet people after a divorce. Whether you’re looking for a new date or just looking for a new group of friends to hang out with, meetup groups are great. You can find meetup groups to do just about any hobby or activity. Some sports meetups play things like kickball, softball, and volleyball. You can also find hobby groups for artists, hiking, or yoga. This is a great low-pressure way to meet new people. The idea isn’t to find romantic partners, but you never know when you might click with somebody.

Find Other Singles

Sometimes you can meet others more easily when you hang out in a group. Going out with your single friends might be a great way to meet people after a divorce. Single groups attract other single groups. And being in a group setting can take the pressure off of the first meeting with somebody. In addition, your friends can meet your new date at the same time.

Finding a way to meet people after a divorce can be overwhelming. Starting with an online website can be the easiest way to dip your toes back into the dating pool. You can also ask your friends and family if they know of any potential partners. Local meetup groups can help you meet tons of people in your area. And finally, sometimes hanging out with other single friends can help you casually meet other potential partners. The hardest thing about getting back into the dating world is just finding the confidence to start. But knowing where to meet new people can help take some of the pressure off and let you get started. Get back out there and find somebody who can be your new special someone!

The Five Stages of Grief After a Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
There are five stages of grief after a divorce. These are the same stages that we often associate with losing a loved one, but they can really apply to any traumatic event. A job loss, sudden break-up, divorce, bad news, or an accident can all result in the same stages of grief. These are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Many people experience these emotions in this order, but that is not always the case. You might move past one stage and think you’re on to the next and suddenly go back a few stages. Grief is a long and difficult process and it is different for everybody. The only thing that can really help is time. Hopefully, you’ll be able to accept your divorce and see it as a fresh start before too long.

The Five Stages of Grief After a Divorce: Going Through the Process

Denial

The first of the stages of grief after a divorce is denial. This is when you are still in shock that the divorce is actually a reality. You might find yourself saying that it feels like a bad dream you need to wake up from. This is our brain’s way of giving you some extra time to process.

Anger

Anger is the next stage in the five stages of grief after a divorce. You might begin to feel overwhelming anger at your spouse for many of your problems. This is a very normal part of the process and can last a long time. However, it’s important to avoid trash-talking no matter how mad you are.

Bargaining

The next step in the five stages of grief after a divorce is bargaining. This is a stage where you might start reconsidering your decision to get divorced. Maybe things weren’t that bad. Even if the divorce was over something serious like infidelity, you might question yourself.

Depression

Depression follows bargaining in the stages of grief after a divorce. This is when the reality of your divorce has finally set in. You might be just now confronting what your future will look like when you’re single. This is a time when many go through depressive stages. Reach out to a supportive friend or find a therapist to help you deal with the depression stage, which can last a while.

Acceptance

Finally, the last of the stages of grief after a divorce is acceptance. This is where you begin to move on from the stress of the divorce. You might begin realizing that there are positives to come out of your situation. Hopefully, you are ready to embrace your new identity and will even feel excited about the next chapter of your life. The five stages of grief after a divorce can take a long time to get through. And each person reacts differently to a shock to their system like a divorce. For some, they might stay in one stage longer than others. Each person has to take their own time and handle things in their own way. Likely, you’ll experience denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and then acceptance. You might ping back and forth between different stages. Or you might think that you’re past a stage and then suddenly find yourself right back in the middle of it. All of these reactions are perfectly normal and healthy. In time, you’ll find acceptance for your new situation. Hopefully, then you’ll be able to find excitement at the prospect of your new life and see the divorce as a chance to get a fresh start.

How-to Get Fit Post-Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Exercise is a great way to feel happier and relieve stress after your divorce. However, it’s also great for its physical health benefits too. Therefore, it’s good to know some helpful strategies to get fit post-divorce. That way, you can really get as much out of your workout as possible…

How-to Get Fit Post-Divorce: Key Techniques

Eat right

Your diet is important if you want to get fit post-divorce. After all, if you don’t eat healthy, then your workout will go to waste. As such, don’t fall into the trap into thinking you can just eat whatever and “sweat it out.” Instead, you should focus on creating a healthy diet which will help support your body during a workout and refuel it afterwards.

For example, eating fruits and vegetables before you work out is better than doing so afterwards, as they’ll be able to help fuel your workout. Afterwards, protein and carbs will be key. Many dietary experts suggest that a 3:1 ratio of carbs-to-protein is best for helping your body recover.

Find a good workout plan

When you want to get fit post-divorce, you should have a good workout plan. Different plans will focus on different parts of the body. Others may specialize in specific goals, like weight loss or muscle gain. Which plan you pick depends on what exercise goals you want to achieve.

Plus, you have a lot of choices to choose from. It’s also easy to mix and max parts of different plans to get a more-complete custom plan. This is good for when you want to add some variety, as your body may build resistance to your normal routine. Mixing things up ensures you get a good workout every time.

Get enough sleep

Sleep is a key element when you want to get fit post-divorce. Sleep is crucial for giving your body time to recover from your workouts and get ready for the next day. In particular, it gives your muscles a chance to heal and get stronger from your exercises. Skimping on sleep can minimize the results you get from your workouts.

In general, it’s good to get at least 8 hours of sleep each night. In fact, working out may make it easier for you to fall asleep. The combination of exercising wearing you out while also improving your body tends to lead to better, longer sleep for many people.

Finding Peace Post-Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

A divorce can end up leaving you pretty shaken up. As such, it’s not uncommon to feel uneasy, which can end up becoming unhealthy. Instead, it’s important to work on finding peace post-divorce. Doing so is key for surviving and thriving in your new post-divorce life…

Finding Peace Post-Divorce: Strike A Balance

Focus on yourself

Sometimes, it’s tough to spend time on yourself after your divorce. After all, you’ve got a lot of things which still need your attention. However, one of the most important things for finding peace post-divorce is being able to focus on yourself.

Think of it like investing for the future. If you take the time now to do some self-care, you’ll be able to move ahead more quickly in your post-divorce life. Plus, it helps that there’s such a wide variety of things you can do. Just taking a few minutes each day for yourself will really go a long way.

Check your diet

Making some dietary changes is also useful for finding peace post-divorce. Most people are aware that eating healthier can make them feel better. Still, when you’re stressed, it’s especially helpful to alter your diet just a bit.

For instance, things like caffeine, sugar, and refined carbs can cause spikes and crashes in your blood pressure, which leads to spikes in stress hormones. Meanwhile, eating a nutrient-dense diet of fruits, vegetables, and lean-proteins can help give you plenty of energy and boost your mood. You can also try out supplements but be sure to do some research beforehand.

Practice some mindfulness

Having a stressful divorce can make you feel a bit confused and frazzled. It can be tough to figure out what exactly your next move should be. Not only is this unpleasant, but it can really cause you to feel uneasy. That’s why it helps to be mindful when finding peace post-divorce.

Taking time to mediate is very beneficial. On top of helping to calm the nervous system, it can also reduce the negative effects of anxiety and depression. To get the most out of your efforts, most experts say to spend at least 15-20 minutes meditating during most days of the week.

Finding a Post-Divorce Travel Companion

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Among many other things that change after a divorce, you will likely find yourself looking for a new post-divorce travel companion. Since traveling with your ex will likely no longer be an option, there are many other great options for people or groups to travel with…

Post-Divorce Travel Companion: Who Can You Travel With?

Travel With a Friend

Oftentimes, friends make great post-divorce travel companions. Since a good friend will know what you have been through, they will likely know how to best support you. You could open up to your friend about how you’re feeling if you’re going through a rough patch. Be sure that you choose to travel with a friend who can be respectful of where you are emotionally.

In that same way, strive to be a good travel companion too. This will help to ensure that your friend has a nice trip as well.

Travel By Yourself

Sometimes, you just need to get away from everything. In those cases, you may be your own best post-divorce travel companion. You may be in need of some space to reflect and think. Be kind to yourself, give yourself and give yourself grace. For example, you may just want to get away and get pampered at a resort just to do something nice for yourself.

Oftentimes, traveling alone can give you the opportunity to reset and start over again. Plus, you won’t have to worry about what anyone else wants to do – just yourself. Since you won’t have a companion with you, just make sure you are staying safe while enjoying yourself.

Travel with a Group

There are many organized group trips to pick from. For example, it’s easy to search for group trips that vary by age-range, group-size or interest. Tour companies such as Gate 1 Travel, Exodus Travel, or Intrepid Travel all offer tour options for solo-travelers.

Who knows, you may even meet your future post-divorce travel companion on a group trip. You already know you share common interests and a desire to travel, so finding a new friend or companion to travel with in the future could be a real possibility.

In summation, after a divorce, traveling may look different than what you are used to. Finding a good post-divorce travel companion, even if it’s yourself, will make future trips something to look forward to.

Post-Divorce Burnout: Moving Forward Healthily

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

It isn’t always easy to adjust to your new life after a divorce. However, it’s important to avoid potential post-divorce burnout. Trying out some handy strategies can help you recompose yourself and move forwards with a stronger mindset…

Post-Divorce Burnout: Keep Going

Take time to grieve

If you don’t allow yourself time to grieve, then your chances of experiencing post-divorce burnout are much higher. Now, with how unpleasant those feelings can be, it makes sense that maybe you don’t want to deal with them. The thing is, if you don’t process them now, they’ll just get worse over time.

You won’t want those feelings of sadness or anger to follow you in your post-divorced life. Instead, take the time now to get them out of your system. You’ll probably be surprised to find that you’ll feel a lot better when you do!

Cut out the negativity

Something else which can lead to post-divorce burnout is stress. It isn’t uncommon to feel pretty stressed out after dealing with your ex all throughout the divorce. Plus, you may also be dealing with needing to find a new job, or a new home. The last thing you need is even more stress and negativity coming from those around you.

Interacting with negative people will only bring your mood down. Therefore, try to surround yourself with positive people who want to help you. Those who you leaned on during your divorce can be just as important for you even when it’s over. It may also be good to look for new friends as well, which can help you move on from the divorce.

Have an outlet

It’s helpful to find some kind of outlet for your stress and negative emotions. When you have a way to channel those feeling into something else, it does a lot to prevent post-divorce burnout. The nice thing is that you’ll have a lot of different options that you can choose from.

For example, many people like to have some kind of journal to write in. This lets them write down their feelings, what’s bothering them, and start to get those negative ones out of their system. It may also be good to pick up a creative hobby, which’ll let you de-stress and have fun at the same time.

New Year Post-Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

You might not feel all that excited entering a new year after a divorce. However, a new year post-divorce doesn’t have to be something which gets you down. Rather, there are some things you can do to make this year something to look forward too…

New Year Post-Divorce: Making Big Changes

Reflect on your ex

Most people would hope to leave behind their ex in a new year post-divorce. Still, it would be good to take some time and reflect on them. It’s somewhat common for people to have an idealized version of their ex. Even after the divorce, they might start to think about if things were “really that bad”.

That’s why it helps to reflect on them now. Really think about how they acted and what caused you to want to leave. Even those little things which got under your skin help you realize who they really were. Once you do this, you can be glad you won’t have to deal with it again.

Set new goals

A new year post-divorce also comes with new freedoms. At this point, you get to call the shots again for your life. You won’t have to worry about someone telling you what you can or can’t do. Rather, you can finally start doing things you want to do again.

This is a perfect time to set some new goals to achieve. For instance, maybe you set a goal to go back to school and get more education for a better job. Or, maybe you want to try and improve your skills in a hobby you like. Goals like these will be a great source of motivation for you in the new year.

Reinvent yourself

Starting a new year post-divorce can be great for reinventing yourself. Again, that new freedom allows for you to become the person you want to be. That means you can change things up. Maybe you get a new wardrobe, a new haircut, or even go for tattoos and piercings! It’s really up to you.

By taking these steps, you can also begin to really appreciate yourself again. It can be tough to feel all that great after a divorce. However, if you really begin to take steps to improve yourself, you’ll soon find you have a lot to be excited about.

Post-Divorce Budget: Managing Your Money

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Getting your new life after your divorce going is easier said than done. In fact, there’s a few things you’ll need to do beforehand. Most notably, this includes setting up a post-divorce budget. Having a good budget can really help you avoid financial stress and begin your new life on the right foot…

Post-Divorce Budget: How To Adapt

Revisit your old one

The building blocks of your post-divorce budget can really come from the old one you had. Now, you’ll certainly have to make some adjustments. After all, you’re probably going from having two sources of income, to only yours. However, there might also be some expenses which you don’t have to worry about, or maybe even some new ones to consider.

Plus, there’s a pretty easy way of visualizing this starter budget. Draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper, and have one side be for your income, and another for expenses. Fill each side out, and then add the totals up at the bottom. This quick draft budget can help you see if your finances are in good shape, or if you need to make some changes.

Focus on the necessities

If you find that your post-divorce budget isn’t looking so good, then it’s time to make some cutbacks. That means that you’ll have to focus on the necessities over the more optional things. Basically, you’ll want to prioritize your needs (clothing, food, shelter, and transport) over your wants.

Still, even for your needs, you don’t have to go crazy. For instance, you might need clothes, but that isn’t an excuse to go on a big upscale shopping spree. Buy the things you can comfortably afford, and cut out those other things which are just draining money. This can help you balance out your budget.

Avoid big purchases

A big purchase can really mess with your post-divorce budget. For example, you might be tempted to move to a new house or get a new car as a sort-of kick starter for your new life. However, these kinds of purchases can really hurt your wallet, and leave you stuck in a worse situation in the long run.

Dating Post-Divorce: Getting Back Out There

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

With how many divorces happen in the U.S. alone, that means there’s a lot of newly single people out there. For some of these people, the question of dating post-divorce is heavy on their minds. While it may feel odd at first, it is possible to rebuild your confidence to begin dating once again…

Dating Post-Divorce: Find Your Confidence

Take time for yourself

Before you start dating post-divorce, try to take some time for yourself. Divorce is a pretty heavy event, and it makes you have to do a lot of thinking. Some of that thinking tends to be doing some self-reflection, and trying to figure out what it is you value in a relationship.

If you just try to jump into a new relationship, more often than not it won’t work out. It’s important to take some time to get yourself ready and prepared to truly enter the dating field again. Remember, there’s no specific time that you have to start dating again. It’s all about when you feel ready.

Do some self-improvement

Your post-divorce life is the perfect time to do some self-improvement. This self-improvement can really help improve your mindset and get you feeling good as you start your new life. Plus, it can also help you get some good confidence before you start dating post-divorce.

For example, many people like to take this time to get healthier by eating right and exercising. Doing this will not only help you feel good, but the results can do a lot for your confidence. So can re-inventing your wardrobe. Feeling confident in how you look can help you feel confident when dating again.

Understand what you want

When you do start dating post-divorce, keep in mind what kind of relationship you want. Do you just want something that’s laid-back and casual? Or are you looking for a serious commitment? Knowing what you want will help you find people who are looking for the same kind of relationship.

Keep in mind too that it can take time to get something going. Odds are, you might have more misses before you find someone who gels with you. Just keep at it and don’t get discouraged!