Peaceful Divorce: Minimize Conflict

Most people assume that a divorce is going to have a lot of conflict. However, many separating partners actually have a relatively peaceful divorce. While it may not always be easy, making a few changes can help you keep conflict to a minimum…

Peaceful Divorce: Avoid Fights

Start off properly

Having a peaceful divorce depends a lot on how you bring up the divorce itself. Depending on how you break the news to your partner, they’ll be more or less likely to get upset. For instance, if you place all the blame on them and get very emotional, they’ll probably respond in a similar, angry manner. This can set a very negative tone for the rest of the divorce

Instead, you want to tell them your feelings peacefully and calmly someplace private. Don’t just start blaming them for everything that went wrong. Rather, explain how you feel and how you hope you can go about matters without conflict. In this situation, your partner is much more likely to agree with you.

Think things through

Your friends and family are very important for helping you during your divorce. At the same time, they’ll also want to give their input on the situation. While their intentions may be to help you, their unsolicited opinions may get overwhelming. In fact, they could influence you to make bad decisions if they’re biased against your ex.

Therefore, if you want a peaceful divorce, you have to think things through on your own. It’s important you have a space you can go to where you can get a clear head and consider what’s going on. That way, you can make the best decision without being influenced by others too much.

Be careful with social media

Many couples who wanted a peaceful divorce had those efforts undermined because of social media.  What usually happens is one ex will make very negative posts about their ex. Of course, it doesn’t take long for the other ex to see these posts, get angry, and change the entire tone of the divorce going forwards.

As a result, you should be extra careful with your social media posts. Avoid talking about your ex, and the divorce itself too. In fact, it may just be best to take a break from social media altogether during this time. That way, you won’t even need to worry about it!

Nesting Co-Parenting: Possible Benefits

Most parents think that co-parenting involves moving the kids from one parent’s house to another. However, nesting co-parenting offers a different perspective. This alternative way of co-parenting might just be the sort of thing you and your co-parent are looking for…

Nesting Co-Parenting: How Its Different

What is “nesting?”

Nesting co-parenting differs from other co-parenting plans mainly in terms of where the kids stay. Usually, after a divorce, either one parent will keep the home and the other will move, or both will move to new homes. Then, the kids will go in-between each household depending on the co-parenting schedule they come up with.

With a nesting arrangement, the kids will actually stay at the family home. Instead, it’ll be you and your co-parent who will come and go. So, for example, one week you’ll stay at the home with the kids, and then switch with your co-parent. That way, the kids don’t have to constantly go back-and-forth between two new homes.

Benefits to the kids

A nesting co-parenting arrangement can be really beneficial to your kids. Divorce is a major time of change both for you and them. Having to constantly go back and forth between you and your co-parent’s new homes can be very difficult for them. Ultimately, it can be hard for them to really feel “at ease”, even if they’re with one of their parents.

However, by nesting, your kids won’t have to worry about that. Rather, they get to stay in the home that they’re already familiar with. This helps them feel much more at ease with the situation, and not have to worry about constantly moving and bringing things between homes.

Benefits for the parents

Of course, a nesting co-parenting plan doesn’t just help the kids. It can also help you and your co-parent also. For instance, many couples find it’s cheaper to use a nesting plan. The cost of two separate apartments can be cheaper than if you were to both look for new homes. Plus, some co-parents will even “split” an apartment, with one of them staying there while the other is with the kids.

You also won’t have to worry about difficult transitions in-between homes. Rather, you’ll know exactly where your kids will be. You can even have smoother transitions than usual, such as if you drop the kids off at school in the morning and their other parent picks them up. Just make sure you communicate this to both your co-parent and the kids!

Divorce with Adult Children: The Challenges

Going through a divorce with adult children still presents problems for families. While it may be easier for an adult child to understand the situation better than a younger child, there are still challenges that a family will face.

Divorce with Adult Children: Things to Expect

Emotional Stress

It’s easy to think that divorce will only hurt young children, but divorce with adult children can be challenging too. It can still certainly emotionally affect their grown children. Parents will lean more on their adult children for emotional support, which may not happen with younger children. The parents share more about their personal details with adult children, which can lead to the children feeling uncomfortable and taking sides.

Grown children can also be angrier with their parents, because they think their parents should have divorced earlier. They can carry guilt if they find out their parents only stayed together in an unhappy marriage just for their sake.

Be Understanding and Supportive

While parents are entitled to separate if they choose to, it’s important that the parents try to speak to their kids with facts instead of with emotion. The act of divorce is emotional. However, joking or making rude comments about the other parent is harmful and can lead to a divide.

While divorce with adult children will not lead to custody battles or switching homes during the week, it can still have other implications. Adult children may need space and time to accept that their parents are getting a divorce, so make sure they are given that space if they need it.

Celebrating Holidays

When going through a divorce with adult children, you will still see issues around holidays. This could include trying to determine where the family will spend Thanksgiving or Christmas. If the divorce is amicable, then the best solution will be to try and get the family together and celebrate as one unit. If the divorce was messy, then you may need to split the two holidays with your former spouse. Another option would be to celebrate those holidays on different days than your ex is.

While many people may not think of the tolls of divorce on grown children, it certainly can affect them. It may affect them in different way than it does young kids, but it still will be difficult. Don’t dismiss their feelings and try to work through this difficult together.

COVID Divorce: Questions To Ask

Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, many couples have put off their divorce plans until after things settle down. In fact, you may be at the point where you’re also considering getting a divorce. Going through with a COVID divorce isn’t an easy decision to make. Therefore, it helps to ask yourself some key questions beforehand…

COVID Divorce: Is It Right For You?

“Is COVID causing your problems?”

When a COVID divorce crosses your mind, you need to consider what exactly the issues are that you’re dealing with. These are stressful times for everyone, and many people have been impacted even if they don’t get sick. Several couples are dealing with not being able to work, which creates a lot of financial stress.

As a result, consider if the issues you’re facing now are because of COVID itself. Do you expect that things will return to normal for your marriage when the situation clears up? If so, step back and consider that maybe it’s just the stress of what’s going on which is getting to you, and how you can better address it.

“Are these pre-existing problems?”

The COVID pandemic has also led couples to consider what problems their relationship has had for a while. In fact, it’s possible that your life beforehand didn’t let you address them properly. For instance, maybe you were both so busy with working all the time. Due to this, you never had time to talk about what was going on.

Now that you have this time, these issues are probably more noticeable. This could be causing you to consider a COVID divorce. First, try and see if you can talk about these problems properly and work towards some changes. This time could be useful for seeing what changes will help your relationship for the better!

“What’s my plan?”

Maybe you’re completely set on a COVID divorce. At this point, you don’t think that you can fix things with your spouse. Still, you won’t want to just try and start a divorce right away. During these times, it’s important that you have a plan in mind.

It’s good to make sure that you’ll have a place to stay and a good source of income before starting your divorce. You should also try and get some important documents together ahead of time. Remember that you won’t want to rush; doing so will just make things trickier for you!

Legal Name Change After Divorce: Update Your Info

Everything is finalized, and you just got a legal name change after your divorce. However, you realize that all of your documents and accounts have your married name on them. There are so many things that you’ll need to update that it may feel overwhelming. Just take one step at a time and you will get it all changed over in no time.

Legal Name Change After Divorce: What Needs Updating

Social Security Card

Before you can proceed with changing over many other documents, you will need to get an updated social security card. Getting a legal name change after a divorce is one of the qualifying reasons that the social security office will let you get an updated card.

In order to get a new card, you will need to go to your local social office. If you don’t want to wait in a line, there may be appointments available if you plan ahead of time. If you are a US citizen, you will be required to bring several original documents with you. These include a proof of name change, so your divorce certificate or court order for a name change. You will need to bring a form of identification, such as a passport or US driver’s license (even if it has your married name). Also, you’ll need proof of citizenship, such as a passport or US birth certificate.

Driver’s License

Once you have an updated social security card, you can go to the DMV to get a new driver’s license. They will not allow you to get a license with a legal name change unless you have a new social security card already. Some states require you to let the DMV know of your legal name change within 60 days.

You’ll need to bring your updated social security card and name change documents with you. Check with your state’s DMV to see what other documentation you may need to bring as well. When you update your driver’s license, you will also be able to update your voter registration as well.

Financial Institutions

Don’t forget to update your credit cards after a legal name change. Those can usually be updated on the internet or over the phone. However, they will typically want proof of the name change.

You will want to contact your bank as well. They will be able to help you update your name on your bank accounts and debit cards.


Depending on if your email address included your married name, you may need to update your email address after you get a legal name change. Likewise, you’ll want to update social media accounts as well. Don’t forget to share the new information with your friends and family, but in the meantime, you can set up an email forwarding system so that emails to your old email address still get to you.

There are many things to consider if you are going to get a legal name change after your divorce. If you do decide to change your name, there will be documents and accounts you’ll need to update as well. It may seem daunting, but by taking one step at a time, you’ll have everything switched over in no time.

Modern Dating: What To Know

It’s not always easy to get back into dating after you’ve gone through a divorce. That’s especially true if you’ve been out of the dating scene for some time. Modern dating comes with a couple of its own unique quirks. Knowing what these are can help you better prepare for when you try and get back out there…

Modern Dating: Unique Trends

The “ghosted” problem

The term “ghosted” had become pretty commonplace in the modern dating scene. Basically, it’s when someone completely stops communicating with you after you thought they were interested. Instead, they’ll either block your number and email, or just flat out ignore you.

This seems pretty harsh, but many times it’s not because of something you did. Rather, the person in question wanted to end things anyways, but also didn’t want any conflict that could come with it. The important thing is to not let it get to you!

Serious relationships take time

It can also take longer to enter a “serious” relationship in the modern dating scene. The thing is, it isn’t always a simple as just going from dates to dating proper. It takes a lot longer for potential partners to feel comfortable with “locking into” something exclusive.

In generally, it usually takes around two months for couples to enter a serious relationship. Before that, you want to make sure you don’t come off too strong. Let things develop naturally, and it’ll be a lot easier to see if your relationship will survive in the long-term.

Online dating is big

A lot of modern dating makes use of online dating sites or apps. In fact, one in five relationships begin via online dating! One in six marriages also began as a relationship created through an online dating service. As you might expect, researchers anticipate these numbers will only increase as time goes by.

Of course, dating online is a bit different than meeting people in-person. However, there’s a lot of convenience which comes with online methods. Plus, it gives you a quick way to filter your results to better find someone you’ll get along with. You just have to be careful about the potential risks as well!

Finding a Post-Divorce Travel Companion

Among many other things that change after a divorce, you will likely find yourself looking for a new post-divorce travel companion. Since traveling with your ex will likely no longer be an option, there are many other great options for people or groups to travel with…

Post-Divorce Travel Companion: Who Can You Travel With?

Travel With a Friend

Oftentimes, friends make great post-divorce travel companions. Since a good friend will know what you have been through, they will likely know how to best support you. You could open up to your friend about how you’re feeling if you’re going through a rough patch. Be sure that you choose to travel with a friend who can be respectful of where you are emotionally.

In that same way, strive to be a good travel companion too. This will help to ensure that your friend has a nice trip as well.

Travel By Yourself

Sometimes, you just need to get away from everything. In those cases, you may be your own best post-divorce travel companion. You may be in need of some space to reflect and think. Be kind to yourself, give yourself and give yourself grace. For example, you may just want to get away and get pampered at a resort just to do something nice for yourself.

Oftentimes, traveling alone can give you the opportunity to reset and start over again. Plus, you won’t have to worry about what anyone else wants to do – just yourself. Since you won’t have a companion with you, just make sure you are staying safe while enjoying yourself.

Travel with a Group

There are many organized group trips to pick from. For example, it’s easy to search for group trips that vary by age-range, group-size or interest. Tour companies such as Gate 1 Travel, Exodus Travel, or Intrepid Travel all offer tour options for solo-travelers.

Who knows, you may even meet your future post-divorce travel companion on a group trip. You already know you share common interests and a desire to travel, so finding a new friend or companion to travel with in the future could be a real possibility.

In summation, after a divorce, traveling may look different than what you are used to. Finding a good post-divorce travel companion, even if it’s yourself, will make future trips something to look forward to.

Parenting Time: Handle Disputes

Once you have put together a co-parenting plan, it can be difficult when your co-parent doesn’t follow it. In particular, it gets frustrating when their actions impact your parenting time. When these disputes arise, it’s important to know how to settle them. That way, you can get back on track and spend that time with your kids…

Parenting Time: Managing Issues

Find the disconnect

Usually, issues with parenting time are due to miscommunication. Somewhere along the way, you and your co-parent ended up on different pages. However, many times they don’t do this on purpose. Rather, it was just a genuine mistake on their part.

That’s why you should avoid trying to pick a fight with them when this issue starts happening. Instead, try and talk to them about what’s going on. It’s possible that they didn’t realize the mistake due to that miscommunication and can quickly fix it with no drama involved.

Re-evaluate the plan

Your parenting time disputes could also be caused by your co-parenting plan. It might be the case that your plan isn’t working as you had originally hoped. As a result, it’s causing problems with how much time you can get with the kids.

In this case, you’ll both want to take another look at your plan. Now that you have tried it out, you can more clearly see what isn’t working and make changes. It may even be easier to scrap the plan entirely and try out something new which’ll better match your new schedules.

Be flexible

Flexibility is important for any co-parenting plan. It’s also a good way to handle parenting time disputes. Certain unexpected situations can make it harder for your co-parent to fully stick with your plan. However, these may just be temporary setbacks for them until they get things back under control.

Therefore, try and be flexible with them as they get reoriented. So long as it doesn’t become a constant thing, it’s okay for there to be a slight change in your plans. Plus, you doing them a favor now makes it more likely for them to do the same when you need some extra help down the line.

Self-care After Divorce: Exercise is Key

Life during and after a divorce can be stressful and draining. Because of this, it is very important to make sure you’re remembering to take care of yourself too. Making self-care after divorce a priority will help you to feel better mentally, emotionally, and physically. Especially when exercise is involved…

Self-care After Divorce: Benefits of Exercise

Exercise Makes You Feel Happier

First off, exercise can make your body release endorphins, which can make you feel happy. Divorce can be very tough, and endorphins can help lift your mood and make you feel better. You don’t have to run a marathon in order to get these endorphins flowing. Even just thirty minutes of moderate-intensity exercise can release mood-lifting endorphins.

Exercise Relieves Stress

In the same way, exercise can help relieve stress. Tension and stress can build-up during and after the divorce process. Yoga is a great form of exercise to alleviate stress. It is low-impact, and focuses on breathing, stretching, and mindfulness. Even while gyms are closed due to Covid-19, there are many yoga classes that can be taken on apps like Down Dog or even YouTube. However, yoga isn’t the only exercise to reduce stress; almost any form of exercise can.

Equally important, exercise can help you to sleep better. This is because you may fall asleep faster and sleep deeper. A good night’s rest is a great way to reduce stress levels.

Exercise Helps Improve Health

Weight fluctuations are common during and after a divorce. Whether it’s gaining or losing too much weight, quick changes like this can be unhealthy. When people exercise, they tend to eat healthier and make smarter choices about alcohol and junk food. This can lead to a healthier weight and improving your overall health. When your body is healthier, it will be ready to face any challenges or obstacles that come your way.

Exercise Improves Self-Esteem

Getting out and moving will not only help you feel better, but it will help you look better too. Exercise helps to build and tone muscles, as well as trim fat. In some situations, divorce can hurt someone’s self-esteem. If you feel like you look better, it will help you feel more confident and happier.

While divorce can negatively impact your overall health, stress levels and happiness, exercise is a great way to regain control over these parts of your life. While it’s easy to get caught up in so many other things right after a divorce, don’t forget to take care of yourself.