How-to Successfully Move Post-Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Following your divorce, it may be tempting to move somewhere new to get a “fresh start.” However, it may not be all that easy to move post-divorce. As such, it’s good to know what steps you can take to improve your chances of success…

How-to Successfully Move Post-Divorce: Helpful Steps

Consider why you want to move

Before you get your move officially underway, it’s important to consider why exactly you want to move post-divorce. There’s a lot of reasons as to why someone may say they want to move. Some want to start over somewhere new away from where their divorce took place. Others believe that there will be better opportunities for them to start doing what they really love instead.

Still, ask yourself if you really need to move in order to do this. Remember, you can make a lot of those positive changes even if you don’t move. You may also need to make extra considerations about your kids if you’re a co-parent.  You’ll only want to move when you’re certain that it’ll be best for you.

Budget ahead of time

Should you decide to move post-divorce, then you’ll want to start working on a budget. Moving isn’t always cheap, especially if you’re going out-of-state. This can make things a bit complicated when coming off of a divorce. Therefore, it’s good to ensure your finances can handle a move.

Consider not just the expected costs, like down payments or rent, but also any additional living costs as well. This can include extra fees, or things like new furniture, utilities, etc. You’ll also want to factor in moving costs, like moving truck rentals, movers, and gas for longer trips.

Talk to the kids

If you’re a single parent, then one of the hardest things can be getting your kids ready for a move post-divorce. The divorce itself already may have caused a lot of change for them. Now, they may have to leave behind things like the school and friends that they were familiar with.

One way to help your kids deal with this, especially if they’re older, is by getting them involved. Ask them for their thoughts of where they’d like to move, or what they’d want out of a school or community. You should also encourage them to keep in touch with their old friends. This will help them feel like an active part of the move, instead of just an unwilling participant.

Household Transitions: Post-Divorce Adjustments

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Having to adapt to two different households can be tough for your kids after your divorce. As a result, it’s important to try and make those household transitions easier for your children. After all, this is completely new to every one of you. Taking time and consideration will help them a lot with going in-between you and your ex’s homes…

Household Transitions: Make Them Easier

Go over your schedule

You won’t want your kids to be caught off guard by a household transition. Not knowing when they’ll need to go from one home to the other can be a source of great anxiety for them. Rather, it’s best you talk to them ahead of time about the schedule you and your co-parent are working on.

Doing this will help your kids better prepare for making these transitions. Plus, it’s very easy to help them keep track, especially when you’re first starting out. A simple calendar can be all they need to easily keep track of when they’re going to make the switch to the other household.

 Avoid making them keep a bag

It’s pretty natural for us to pack a bag when we’re making a trip. In this context, however, it’s probably best that you make it so your kids won’t need to do so. Having them pack a bag of their stuff each time they go between homes can make these household transitions a lot harder on them.

Basically, this causes their homes to not really feel like a home. Rather, they’ll constantly feel like they have one foot out the door. It can also be stressful if they forget something at another house. Instead, you should both make it so there’s very little your kids will need when they go from one house to the other.

Avoid changeover conflict

For parents, the tricky part of household transitions can be having to be together again. Depending on your co-parenting relationship, these meetups can be potential points of contention for the both of you. This is especially true if there was something related to the kids that you recently disagreed on.

Still, you want to avoid any conflict during these transitions. Not only will it be bad for your co-parenting goals, but it’ll also be bad for the kids as well. Save those types of conversations for another time so your kids won’t be caught up in the blow back.

Sick Child: Co-parenting in Difficult Times

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Every parent expects for their kid to get sick now and then. However, having a sick child while co-parenting can impact your normal plan. Therefore, it’s good to know how you can co-parent effectively while also caring for your kid at the same time…

 Sick Child: Co-Parenting Methods

Prepare in advance

It’s always a good idea to plan in advance for a sick child. If it’s something you know will happen eventually, you should go ahead and get yourself ready. For instance, you both will want to stock up on some good basic medicine. You’ll also want to have any other important info, like their doctor’s contact details, insurance details, and lists of any medication or allergies.

As an extra precaution, be sure to know where to go in case of an emergency. The last thing you want when your kid gets really sick is not knowing where you can go for help. Take time to figure out where the closest hospitals are for both of your homes.

Be willing to make changes

When dealing with a sick child, you’ll want to be flexible when it comes to your original co-parenting plan. It could be the case that your kid is too sick to go to school, or even move houses. It’ll be a lot better for their recovery and overall well-being if they instead stay in one place as they try and get over their sickness.

Just be sure that you and co-parent talk about this beforehand. You don’t want to just say out of nowhere that you won’t be sticking to the original agreement. As long as you’re both on the same page, it becomes easier to accept these short-term changes.

Be united

The best thing you can do for your sick child is to come together and help them. Now is a time where they’ll especially benefit from care from the both of you. Even if you have your differences, this is when it’s much better to work as a team rather than be at odds with one another.

For example, maybe your co-parent can call and text your child more to make up for the other missed time. You may even invite them over to let them spend time together. This is great for your kid’s well-being, and shows them you both care for them and are helping to make them feel better.

Legal Name Change After Divorce: Update Your Info

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Everything is finalized, and you just got a legal name change after your divorce. However, you realize that all of your documents and accounts have your married name on them. There are so many things that you’ll need to update that it may feel overwhelming. Just take one step at a time and you will get it all changed over in no time.

Legal Name Change After Divorce: What Needs Updating

Social Security Card

Before you can proceed with changing over many other documents, you will need to get an updated social security card. Getting a legal name change after a divorce is one of the qualifying reasons that the social security office will let you get an updated card.

In order to get a new card, you will need to go to your local social office. If you don’t want to wait in a line, there may be appointments available if you plan ahead of time. If you are a US citizen, you will be required to bring several original documents with you. These include a proof of name change, so your divorce certificate or court order for a name change. You will need to bring a form of identification, such as a passport or US driver’s license (even if it has your married name). Also, you’ll need proof of citizenship, such as a passport or US birth certificate.

Driver’s License

Once you have an updated social security card, you can go to the DMV to get a new driver’s license. They will not allow you to get a license with a legal name change unless you have a new social security card already. Some states require you to let the DMV know of your legal name change within 60 days.

You’ll need to bring your updated social security card and name change documents with you. Check with your state’s DMV to see what other documentation you may need to bring as well. When you update your driver’s license, you will also be able to update your voter registration as well.

Financial Institutions

Don’t forget to update your credit cards after a legal name change. Those can usually be updated on the internet or over the phone. However, they will typically want proof of the name change.

You will want to contact your bank as well. They will be able to help you update your name on your bank accounts and debit cards.

Internet

Depending on if your email address included your married name, you may need to update your email address after you get a legal name change. Likewise, you’ll want to update social media accounts as well. Don’t forget to share the new information with your friends and family, but in the meantime, you can set up an email forwarding system so that emails to your old email address still get to you.

There are many things to consider if you are going to get a legal name change after your divorce. If you do decide to change your name, there will be documents and accounts you’ll need to update as well. It may seem daunting, but by taking one step at a time, you’ll have everything switched over in no time.

Remarrying: A Leap of Faith

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

With how hard it can be to date again after a divorce, you’ll probably be pretty happy when you find someone you connect with. When things start to get more “serious”, thoughts of remarrying might cross your mind. However, what if you’re unsure about if things will be a repeat of last time? There’s a few things you can do to help ensure this marriage goes how you want…

Remarrying: Making It Work

Understand your baggage

Remarrying without some kind of baggage is basically impossible. Still, that doesn’t mean you should be afraid of that. Rather, it means you should take the time to understand what this baggage is, and why you may have it. Once you do that, then you can ensure it won’t interfere with your new marriage.

For example, say your last marriage ended due to infidelity. This might cause you to be suspicious of your partner if they’re running late or out of town. You could also have trouble trusting them. Eventually, this could cause problems if you don’t confront and move past it.

Be open & vulnerable

Another thing about remarrying is that it’s important to be open to your new partner. It’s understandable to worry about being too vulnerable. Doing so can make you feel exposed, and bring about fears that your partner will take advantage of that openness, potentially like your last one did.

While that openness can be scary, it’s also an important part of any trusting relationship. You and your partner have to both be able to be honest with each other. If you are willing to be vulnerable, they will be as well, and your bond will strengthen overall.

Keep expectations realistic

Remarrying tends comes with extra expectations. Not only do you want this marriage to go well, but you’ll also probably be comparing it to your previous one. Sometimes, these expectations can get a little out of hand, and take a toll on your relationship when things don’t live up to them.

To avoid this, you and your partner should keep those expectations realistic. Try to sit down and talk to each other about some of those key expectations you have. These could be about finances, handling conflicts, raising kids, or anything else you may think of. That way, you can both be on the same page and get your expectations set accordingly.

Extra Income Post-Divorce: Making Money

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

The financial costs of divorce can have you eager to start working again. Still, even when you start working, you might find yourself needing some more money. That’s why it’s useful to look for extra income post-divorce. There’s a few ways you can earn that extra bit of cash…

Extra Income Post-Divorce: Financial Independence

Sell old belongings

One way to get some extra income post-divorce is by selling off things you don’t need anymore. Everyone has some things which are just taking up space in the home. This could be old clothes sitting in the closet, or some decor or furniture that goes unused. Rather than letting it go to waste, it can be useful to try and sell them.

Even if it’s older or in rough condition, you’d be surprised how much you can get for old clothes, furniture, and other items. Plus, on top of getting some money, you also create space for new replacements. While an old-fashion garage sale can work well, there’s also a lot of stores which will take your old items off your hands.

Pick up a “side gig”

There’s been a lot of talk about “side gigs” these days. These are something you do outside of your main job to get a bit of extra cash. That means they’re also pretty handy for getting extra income post-divorce. What’s nice is that there’s a wide variety of gigs you can try your hand at.

For example, everyone is familiar with ride sharing services like Uber or Lyft. However, you could also try freelance writing if that sounds more up your alley. There’s also transcription services; many of them can be done online, and at your own leisure.

Look for seasonal work

Maybe you only need some extra income post-divorce for a short time. One common time people like to make more money is around the holidays. In these cases, where it’ll only be temporary, you could also look for any seasonal jobs that are hiring.

Like the name implies, these jobs will only need you to work for a short time. Plus, they’re usually eager to fill the positions. If you can find a way to fit them into your schedule, and don’t mind the work, then they can be a nice way to make some more money.

How-to Start Working Again After Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

When going through a divorce, you will need to start thinking about your financial situation. Perhaps you were a stay-at-home parent during your marriage and do not have a job now. This life change may now require you to start working again after your divorce. This may be an easy transition for you, but some may also find it to be challenging to reenter the workforce.

How-to Start Working Again After Divorce: Life Transition Preparation

Finances

First, you will need to take a hard look at your finances. Perhaps even after the divorce, you will be in a financial situation where you do not have to work. However, it may be the case where you determine that you will need to start working again after the divorce. Depending on your finances, you will be able to determine if you will need to get a full-time or a part-time job. You will also need to consider if your skillset will allow you to get a job that can cover your expenses.

Continuing Education

Perhaps you have determined that you do not have the skills for a job that gets the income level that you desire or need. In this case, before you start working again, you may need to go back to school. There are quick programs that you can do, such as becoming a dental assisting or a licensed real estate agent. There are even bootcamps for coding classes or digital marketing that will fast-track you to a new career.

For you, getting back into your career may even just be a matter of taking a few continuing education courses to brush up on your knowledge and skills. If you have been out of the workforce for a while, your field likely has new made advancements. Refreshing and updating your skills will make you a more competitive candidate.

Evaluate Your Interests

You will want to evaluate your interests before you start working again. You may have went to school for one thing, but no longer be passionate about that anymore. It is very common for people to find a new career path during their life. Think about what things you enjoy doing and think about how you can apply those things to a job. You will be more likely to enjoy your job if you are doing something that you love.

While it can be daunting to think about going back to work after being out of the workforce for a while, or needing to find a new career that better fits your current situation, it is very possible to do this. Just look at your finances, take courses if needed, and consider your interests. Following these steps will help make the transition much easier.

How to Talk About Your Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

It can be incredibly painful to talk about your divorce. However, inevitably it’s going to come up in conversations. It can help to have an idea of what you’d like to say when people ask that doesn’t give away too many details. Start with your close family and friends and then slowly expand the circle of people that know. You might want to give your boss a heads up as well. Have an idea of how you want to approach the conversation. And always avoid trash-talking your ex, and don’t be afraid to remind people that this is something they should keep private. As time goes on it will feel easier and easier to talk about your divorce as you begin to emotionally move on.

How to Talk About Your Divorce: Getting Comfortable with the Conversation

Telling Friends and Family

When you talk about your divorce, it should probably start with your close family. For instance, your parents and siblings. This is a big adjustment for them because the future they imagined for you is changing. Try to leave out the nitty-gritty details and don’t assume that your friends will need to “pick a side.” You don’t need to tell a ton of people until after your divorce is final, so stick to very close friends and family.

Telling Work

While your coworkers don’t necessarily need to know anything about your private life, you might want to let your boss know. It would help if you talked about your divorce with them and maybe your HR rep. This way, they won’t be surprised if you need some time off for court dates. Assure them that it won’t affect your work.

Have a Script

It can help to have a script ready to go when you talk about divorce. Especially if you are telling a casual acquaintance. You could say that although you both wanted it to, the marriage wasn’t working. Ask them to respect your privacy as well. Having something prepared in advance can prevent you from feeling caught off guard if somebody casually asks about it.

Don’t Trash Talk

Finally, the most important thing to remember is to avoid trash-talking about your ex when you talk about your divorce. It can be easy to want to tell everybody about how they hurt you. However, it doesn’t help anything and your ex might find out. This can affect your co-parenting relationship if you have children or can make your divorce even more contentious.


When you begin to talk about your divorce, it can feel very awkward at first. However, eventually, you’ll need to be able to tell people about it in a way that doesn’t invite a lot of questions or nosiness. Have a script ready to go that keeps things short and sweet. Tell your family and close friends first. Then slowly move out to more distant acquaintances after the divorce is final. Don’t let your divorce become office gossip, however, you should let your boss know. Assure them that it won’t affect your work. Have an idea of how to tackle the question if people ask you about your divorce that doesn’t involve trash-talking your ex. Hopefully, you’ll begin to feel less uncomfortable telling people about your divorce as you start to heal and move on with your life.

Home Buying Post-Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

When your divorce is over, it might be nice to spruce up the home a bit. However, what if want to live somewhere new? Home buying post-divorce can be a bit complex, which is why you’ll want to make sure you do it right…

Home Buying Post-Divorce

Be financially ready

Before engaging in any home buying post-divorce, you need to be financial prepared. Divorce tends to leave a big impression on a person’s finances. You might have to not just pay divorce costs, but also adapt to a new single-income household. This can leave your finances in a bit of a critical state.

Plus, buying a house isn’t cheap. It’s a big financial commitment, so you need to be sure you’re ready. Consider what you have saved now, and if it’ll cover buying a house and the other costs, like moving. It’s much better to wait and save in order to avoid financial issues.

Know your needs

Another thing to consider when home buying post-divorce is what you need in a house. For instance, if you have kids, you’ll need rooms and space for them. If you don’t, then you could make due with a smaller home. Or, maybe you need a house which is closer to your new job.

When you recognize your needs, you can plan your house searching accordingly. Plus, you’ll also avoid buying a house with things you don’t need. After all, the bigger the house, the more it’ll cost. Saving money when you can is always handy with purchases like these.

Use a professional

Home buying post-divorce isn’t something you want to do blind. Trying to find house and look at them yourself is going to be a struggle. Plus, odds are you don’t know the finer details which you should be looking for. That’s why it’s useful to bring in a professional.

Making use of a real estate agent can help ensure you find the right house for you. These agents will know what homes are available, if they fit your budget, and where they may need repairs or inspections. That way, you don’t get burned on a potentially bad buy.

New Year, New You: Moving on After Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
Moving on after a divorce can be a long and difficult process. And it can look different for everybody. But if you’ve recently gone through a divorce, the new year is a great time to set goals for yourself and what you want in your life. It’s a time to begin the healing process and start making yourself a priority again. Try to find a new hobby that you can focus on, or learn something new. In addition, starting new hobbies is a great way to meet new people. Take plenty of time to heal from the pain of the divorce process, and reach out for help if you need it. Finally, if you feel ready, get back into the dating pool and see if you can find somebody that you’d like to connect with. You never know when you’ll meet somebody special!

New Year, New You: Moving on After a Divorce in a Healthy Way

Find a New Hobby

One important aspect of moving on after a divorce is to keep yourself busy. It will distract you from all of the stress and bitter feelings of the divorce process. One great way to do this is to pick up a new hobby or interest. There are plenty of sports or exercises you can try like yoga, jogging, or hiking. You can also take up an artistic hobby like painting. Find something that brings you joy. In addition, you’ll probably feel a sense of pride as you excel in your new hobby.

Meet Some New People

Another great way of moving on after a divorce is to meet new people. This doesn’t have to be potential love interests. It could just be getting out there and making new friends. There are plenty of local meetup groups for divorcees, as well as group exercise classes you can try. You might not be looking to find a new partner, but you never know who you’ll meet when you put yourself out there.

Take Time to Heal

Moving on after a divorce can take a long time. But it’s important to go at your own pace and take plenty of time to heal. You might have had a very painful breakup or a stressful divorce proceeding. Take time to prioritize your mental health. If you feel like you need some professional help or just want a little extra support, reach out to a therapist. They can help you address your feelings, move on, and deal with stress.

Get Back to Dating

Finally, moving on after a divorce is easiest when you have a new love interest to focus on. When you feel like you are ready to be open and trusting with another person, try dipping your toes into the dating pool again. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to find your next soul mate. Instead, take time to enjoy dating. Take things slowly with a new partner and try to have fun with it. Moving on after a divorce can take weeks, months, or years. Every person is different and every divorce is different. Everyone has to move at their own pace. However, it’s easy to get bogged down by the stress and pain of a breakup. Make sure that you are still taking time to try new hobbies to take your mind off of things. In addition, try to make new friends and put yourself out there in social situations. Don’t forget to make time to prioritize your mental health, though, and reach out for professional support if you need some extra help. And finally, when you feel ready, try dating again. Just remember to enjoy yourself and have fun with it. Divorce is painful and stressful, but it also opens the door for a new chapter in your life.