Divorcee Etiquette

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
If you are deciding to get back into the dating game, you’ll need to be aware of common divorcee etiquette. While you don’t want to harp on your divorce, it’s important to be honest about your past. It’s best to wait until your divorce is final before going public with any new partners. Otherwise, you could risk affecting your settlement negatively. Don’t compare your new date with your ex, and try to remember that they will handle situations differently. Finally, don’t trash your ex constantly. Not only can it affect your relationship, but it makes it seem like you aren’t emotionally healed from the breakup. Hopefully, you can navigate the complicated world of dating and find somebody that is a perfect match.

Divorcee Etiquette When Dating Again

Be Honest About the Divorce

One of the most important things to know about divorcee etiquette is that you should be up-front about your status. While you don’t have to go into details (in fact, it’s best not to), you should let any new partners know that you are a divorcee. Try to keep the explanation simple and straightforward.

Don’t Go Public Until Divorce is Final

Another aspect of divorcee etiquette is that you should not be flashy about any new relationships while your divorce proceedings are still happening. In fact, in some states, it could harm your settlement or even custody. Even if you and your ex are both on the same page about your split, seeing you with a new partner might make things more contentious. And finally, your children might not react well to you introducing them to a new partner so soon. It’s best to wait until your divorce is final, and you are emotionally healed, before dating again.

Don’t Compare Partners

It’s also helpful to avoid trying to compare any new dates with your ex. Whether you are comparing them positively or negatively, try to remember that they’re their unique person. Just because your ex reacted a certain way to a situation doesn’t mean that a new partner will. Try to be open-minded about dating, and avoid making comparisons to your ex-spouse.

Don’t Trash the Ex

Finally, it’s also important divorcee etiquette not trash the ex. If you need to vent about your ex, find a friend or therapist to talk to. But don’t unload on a new partner. It can make you seem like you are either bitter or like you are not moving on fully from the breakup. Additionally, if your ex finds out that you are trashing them, it can make custody more difficult. It’s best to avoid the topic of the ex whenever possible and remember “When you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Divorcee etiquette can be a little complicated, but the most important thing is to have fun with dating. Allow yourself plenty of time to grieve the end of your marriage and emotionally heal from the stress of divorce. Focus on self-care and building back relationships that might have been neglected. Then, when things are final and you are moving on, consider dating once again. Be upfront about your status as a divorcee, but don’t go on and on about your breakup. Additionally, avoid comparing your new date to your spouse, and also try not to bash your ex in front of them. Hopefully, you’ll be able to move on quickly from your divorce and enjoy dating once again. You never know when you’ll meet the perfect match!

Fighting Loneliness After Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
Fighting loneliness after divorce can be tough. You have likely been living with another person for many years, and it can be quite hard to suddenly learn to live alone. However, know that you will quickly get used to your new situation. It can help to reconnect with old friends that you’ve lost touch with. You can also make new friends by joining a local meet-up group or getting back out into the dating world. It helps to stay busy with hobbies and interests. And finally, adopting a pet is always a great way to fight loneliness. Divorce is stressful and difficult, but for many, adapting to their new way of life is just as hard. Hopefully, you will be able to adjust quickly and find some ways to fill your time and help battle loneliness.

Fighting Loneliness After Divorce: Adjusting to Your New Normal

Reconnect with Old Friends

Fighting loneliness after divorce can start with reconnecting with old friends. The divorce process is stressful and complicated. It can often take up tons of your time. So it’s possible that you haven’t had time for friends lately. Now is a great time to reach out and try to re-connect. Invite them out for a quick bite or a cup of coffee to catch up.

Join a Local Meet-Up Group or Dating Website

Another way of fighting loneliness after divorce is to join a local meet-up group. There are groups for many different hobbies and interests. There are also groups specifically for divorcees. And of course, if you are comfortable and feel ready, you can always re-join the dating pool. It can be scary at first, but if you take your time and take things slow, you might connect with somebody amazing.

Stay Busy

Fighting loneliness after divorce is easiest if you stay busy. Boredom always increases feelings of loneliness. Try to focus on a new hobby or interest. Or reconnect with an old passion. You can take classes, explore museums, or even do virtual tours. Taking up a new hobby is also a great way to meet new people who share the same interests as you.

Adopt a Pet

Finally, one final and fun way of fighting loneliness after divorce is to adopt a pet. There are many needy animals out there just looking to be adopted by a loving parent like you. Just make sure that you have the time and energy to dedicate to a pet. Consider rescuing a pet from a local rescue group, shelter, or foster service instead of going to a breeder. Fighting loneliness after divorce can be hard. It’s difficult when you’ve lived with another person for many years to suddenly adjust to single life. Even just learning to cook for one can be an adjustment. However, you can fight the loneliness by making time to reconnect with old friends. Or you can take up a new hobby. This is also a great way to meet somebody new to date or some new friends. There are plenty of meetup groups available to fit any interest. If you feel ready, try online dating, or asking a friend to set you up on a date. And finally, adopting a pet can be a great way to get a loving buddy for many years. Hopefully, you’ll adjust to your new normal quickly and find happiness.

Splitting Up Household Chores Fairly

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

Splitting up household chores fairly can be a huge way to relieve marital stress. Although it might not seem like a big deal, people’s living space has a big impact on their mood. If your house is messy, it can create more anxiety. And if one partner feels like household duties always fall on their shoulders, it can create some resentment. Brainstorm all of the various household needs, and then create a schedule that feels fair to both of you. Hold each other accountable, and don’t shirk your duties. And finally, don’t forget about the mental load. Especially if you have children or other responsibilities. Hopefully, by sharing to make your space more attractive, you can reduce marital stress.

Splitting Up Household Chores Fairly in a Marriage

Create a List of Responsibilities

The first thing to do when splitting up household chores is to make a master list of everything that needs to be done. Include things like cleaning the house, laundry, yard upkeep, and routine maintenance. Then, add to its work like paying bills, organizing the family schedule, or various childcare responsibilities. Try to think of all of the various tasks that need to be accomplished.

Make a Schedule

Now, it’s time to start splitting up household chores. Get out a sheet of paper and begin working out a schedule of when each of you will be responsible for your tasks. If you have certain chores that you hate doing, and chores that you don’t mind, share this with your partner. It might work out that you coordinate perfectly, or you might just have to rotate if you both hate the same tasks.

Hold Each Other Accountable

Don’t shirk your duties if you’ve gone through the trouble of splitting up household chores. It isn’t fair to your partner or the rest of your family. Instead, try to hold each other accountable. Understand that there might be times when one partner needs a break or needs a little help. Try to support each other with gentle reminders instead of nagging. And finally, don’t nitpick the way your partner does their chores. Even if you tackle things differently, as long as the job gets done, there’s no need to criticize.

Don’t Forget About Mental Work

Finally, don’t forget the mental work that goes into keeping up a household. Not only do you need to be splitting up household chores, but also emotional and mental work as well. For example, keeping up with finances, scheduling doctors’ appointments for the family, or coordinating sports schedules. If you have young children you’ll also do a fair bit of homework help, shopping for gifts for holidays, planning vacations, and even things like shopping for clothing in the next size.

Splitting up household chores can go a long way in helping you and your spouse get along better. When it feels like both of you are giving equal effort into maintaining your way of life, you’ll hopefully be a stronger couple. Sit down and make a list of all of the various responsibilities that you have as a family. If you have children, this might include a lot of mental work as well. Then, take time to create a realistic schedule that feels fair to each of you for sharing these responsibilities. After that, it’s just a matter of sticking to your schedule and fulfilling your promises to your partner. Hopefully, you can both give each other the respect you deserve by contributing equally to your household’s happiness and upkeep. And when your children are older, you can include them too!

Divorce Transition for Babies

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
While we often think about the difficulties of divorce in older children, the divorce transition for babies can also be tough. Even infants can sense when parents are anxious, so they might pick up on divorce stress. To prevent any sort of disruptions, focus on quality time with your children when you are around them. Try to keep your schedules across your and your ex’s houses the same. And finally, now is the time to work on perfecting the art of co-parenting. Divorce is tough on everybody, and that includes very young children as well. Make things as smooth as possible for everyone by focusing on quality time together and peaceful co-parenting.

Divorce Transition for Babies: Smoothing Things Out

Do Babies Understand Divorce?

While the divorce transition for babies is very different than for older children, infants still do have stress during a divorce. Even young babies who have no idea what divorce is can pick up on stress in their parents and older siblings. Especially if their parents are fighting with one another in front of them. So try to limit your arguments with your ex in front of children, even infants.

Focus on Quality Time

Focusing on quality time can help with the divorce transition for babies. You and your ex might be switching childcare, or having your child go back and forth between your houses. If that’s the case, really focus on keeping your time together sacred. Set aside the phone and pay attention to your child and their needs. Play with them and make the moments that you do have together extra special.

Keep Schedules Consistent

Babies thrive on consistency, so to ease the divorce transition for babies, keep your schedules the same across your houses. You and your ex should follow similar times for napping, sleeping, feeding, and play times. The more consistent you can be, the easier the transitional period will be for your child.

Perfect Your Co-Parenting

The absolute best thing that parents can do for children of any age is to get great at co-parenting. Coordinating custody schedules, sharing responsibilities, splitting holidays, and getting along with your ex are all skills that take time to perfect. While babies might be more difficult on your sleep schedule, they have relatively few obligations. Unlike older children who have extra-curricular and sports schedules to maintain. Use this time to perfect your co-parenting skills so that it’ll be a breeze to handle when your child’s schedule gets more complicated. The divorce transition for babies is not as difficult as for older children, but it’s still important to be mindful of your infant’s needs at this time. While babies certainly don’t understand what a divorce means, they do pick up on tension and stress when parents argue in front of them. Try to limit any fights to when you and your ex are in private. Additionally, keep your schedules as consistent as possible between your houses. Focus on making the time you have with your infant quality time. And finally, work on perfecting your co-parenting skills now so that you can handle more complicated schedules and childcare needs in the future. Hopefully, you and your ex can make this transitional period easier for everybody.

Pet Ownership During Divorce

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves
Pet ownership during divorce can be a heated and complicated subject. Our pets become like important members of the family. So if you are considering a divorce you might be wondering: what happens to the dog? Pets are considered property, so a judge will divvy them up as an asset, just like any other asset in your marriage. If you want to protect your ownership of an animal that you bring into the marriage, you might want to investigate a pet prenuptial agreement. Many couples find creative ways to share custody of pets, but it’s important to consider what is best for your animal. If you are agonizing over the thought of your pet going through divorce, you are not alone. But the important thing is to provide plenty of love during this transition period.

Pet Ownership During Divorce: Who Gets the Dog?

Pets as Property

While we might think of our pets as members of our family, pet ownership during divorce is a little more straight-forward. Pets are property. When considering all of your assets, any animals will be thrown into the mix just like other property. If you and your ex are struggling to decide who gets the dog, a judge might have to make the decision for you. They’ll probably take into account if one of you brought the pet into the marriage, as well as other factors.

Pet Prenup

If you don’t want to struggle with anxiety over pet ownership during divorce, you might consider a pet prenup. A prenuptial agreement is a legal contract between two people that are intending to marry that outlines what will happen to assets in the event of a divorce. If you are bringing a pet into your marriage, you can outline in a prenup that the pet is yours in the event of a breakup.

Custody Arrangements

Pet ownership during divorce can get a little complicated, but ultimately, one spouse will have ownership in the end. However, this doesn’t mean that you and your ex cannot arrange your own pet custody agreement. Many couples choose to share custody of animals and allow the pet to go back and forth between their houses.

What’s Best for the Animal?

While many couples choose to share custody of their pets, it’s important to make sure that this is an arrangement that works for your animal. Some pets do fine going back and forth every week or every month between owners. For others, it can be stressful. You and your ex should keep your schedules as consistent as possible as far as eating and sleeping times. However, it’s important to make the decision that is best for your pet’s overall happiness. Pet custody during divorce is no small matter. Couples get incredibly heated and passionate about choosing who gets to keep the animal during a break-up. In fact, some couples are hesitant to even consider divorce because of the stress of figuring out what to do with their pet. Animals are considered property in a divorce, so a judge will make a ruling about who ultimately keeps them. However, many couples choose to work out a shared custody arrangement so that each can spend time with the dog or cat. If you are anxious, you might consider a pet prenup if you are bringing an animal into the marriage. Hopefully, you and your ex can find the solution that works best for you, and for you pet.