There’s no real “perfect” time to get a divorce. Most people try to avoid starting a divorce around holidays or birthdays, but a divorce can take some time. That’s why it’s important to know how to handle family events during divorce. That way, you can make these events as successful as possible while still handling your divorce…
Family Events: How To Handle Them
Remember your shared goals
Defining goals and potential concerns is a big aspect of mediation. This is different from defining a position. For example, saying you deserve to keep the house is a position, whereas saying you need housing that’s close to your child’s school is a goal. This similar process can be applied to handling family events during divorce.
Ask your partner what your goals and concerns are for an upcoming event. Most people will see that their goals are usually similar: they want their family or kids to enjoy the event and for everyone to have a good time. Still, you might have some concerns, like about potential arguments. However, once you’ve identified these goals and concerns, you can start making a plan.
Develop your plan
A good plan is key for managing family events during divorce. The more developed your plan is, the better your chances are for the event going smoothly. Try to think about the whole event, from beginning to end, and come up with a plan that is both realistic and enjoyable.
Still, you and your partner might not agree on certain parts of the plan. In these cases, try to consider if what you or they are suggesting is feasible or more difficult. You want to be flexible, but you also have to recognize when things might not work. The best way to handle this is to explain to your spouse any issues you see and why in a clear and calm manner.
Prepare for success
Working with your spouse is one part of making family events during divorce a success. The other part comes down to how you prepare for these events. That means setting yourself up for success well in advance through good self-care measures.
It’s important to get enough rest and eat enough before going to these events. Divorce can be quite a draining a process. However, being tired or hungry will lessen your ability to enjoy these events. That’s why you should try to get plenty of sleep and have a full stomach beforehand.
