Post-Quarantine Divorce: An Unexpected Increase?

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

The COVID-19 pandemic and quarantine has certainly shaken things up for many couples. However, not all relationships will make it through unscathed. In fact, many experts expect to see a rise in post-quarantine divorce rates. There’s a couple reasons why this may be happening…

Post-Quarantine Divorce: Why It’s Happening

Previously planned

The simplest reason as to why some couples will get a post-quarantine divorce is because they already planned to split beforehand. In order to slow the spread of the virus, many states and countries issued stay-at-home orders. This meant places which usually would be open have had to either had to close or shift to online-only access.

As a result, many couples saw their divorce plans hit a snag. With places like courthouses offering limited accessibility, it became harder to get things moving. Instead, they usually agree to wait until the lock downs are over, which’ll make things much easier for them. In the meantime, they’ll keep preparing to ensure a smooth return to the divorce process .

Growing tensions

The other main reason behind a post-quarantine divorce is the quarantine itself. The quarantine means couples have to spend a lot of time with each other in the house. As a result, if they were already having problems, then things can quickly get worse as they have nowhere else to go.

Many couples find themselves fighting more often while in quarantine. With nothing else to do, it becomes easier for these fights and problems to take priority and become the focal point. Other couples are taking this time to do some self-reflection, and may realize that they aren’t happy with their current marriage and want some change.

What to do

If a couple was already set on divorcing beforehand, then they probably won’t change their mind about a post-quarantine divorce. However, for other couples, it is possible to change things. While resources like marriage counseling might not be available, couples can still work on improving their relationship. This could help them to take the time to fix their issues, rather than letting them get worse.

Still, if a couple reflects and realize a divorce is best for them, then they don’t just have to sit around. Rather, they can begin adapting themselves to what their post-divorce life may be like. This can include setting up good boundaries despite still living together, and talking to the kids about what’ll happen.

Marriage Counseling

Posted on by Robert J. Reeves

If you are having problems in your marriage, it’s a great step to try marriage counseling. When it’s the right fit for the both of you, marriage counseling can truly be the difference between make or break. However, marriage counseling doesn’t work for everyone. But, just with anything, it can take time to really make a change. If marriage counseling still isn’t helping after a while, you may be wondering when to hang up the hat…

Marriage Counseling: When to Call it Quits

Checking all the Boxes

For starters, marriage should be what’s right for you and your spouse. For example, do the both of you want counseling? Are the both of you aware of what problems need addressing? Additionally, do the both of you believe your counselor is the best fit for you? Checking all of these boxes is part of what makes marriage counseling successful. If it hasn’t been working, make sure to see that you’ve checked all the boxes.

Time

Just like for most things, time is one of the most important parts of marriage counseling. With some couples, their marriage is already improving after a handful of sessions. However, with other couples, they may go to counseling for years and still cannot resolve their problems. Ultimately, basing how much time has passed with progress is only something that can be done by the couple. The two of you are the only ones who can honestly say whether or not something is working in the time you’ve had.

Are Your Hearts in It?

No matter what, marriage counseling shouldn’t happen unless both spouses are on board. That means, both spouses have to want the counseling and be serious about going to sessions and doing their homework. If not, then counseling most likely won’t work.

On the flip side, the both of you could be passionate about going but lack of success has hindered you. In that case, there is a chance you can increase your morale. Focus, instead on the lack of success, but that you have someone that wants to work things out with you. However, if the two of you genuinely don’t think counseling is working, then it may be time to stop.

Marriage counseling is helpful but tricky. If all the variables aren’t right, things can get messy. However, as long both spouses are using their time properly and still want counseling, everything could work. Sadly, that doesn’t always mean it will work. Communicate with your partner throughout this process. Therefore, it’ll make this whole process clearer.